"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn

"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn
it's a jungle out there

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

First Day of School


Jack starts tomorrow. He spent the day sleeping. Just like the 13 year old that he is.
Ty and Mia walked out the front door easy peasy.
Both were excited and nervous, which I don't get because
a: they supposedly hate school and
2: they've been at the same school forever.

They know everyone, and everyone knows them. Mia even has the same teacher she had last year, and the year before.
Her teachers keep getting knocked up so she keeps getting the long term sub.
Miss Perma-Sub is a very nice young teacher who loves Mia and who Mia loves in return.

And all Mia's best girlfriends and boyfriends are in her class. She was so happy when she got home.
The Universe is Abundant.

Ty has a super duper awesome teacher. He also had a great first day.
Until 3:24 when they were on line for dismissal and he threw up on his sneakers.
In front of everyone.
On the first day of 5th grade.


The dumbass school nurse called me to come get him.
Which I thought was particularly dumbass since he threw up during dismissal and we live 90 seconds from the school.

My issues with this particular school nurse go way back.
When we first moved here, she made the huge mistake of leaving a message on our answering machine telling me I needed to have Jack's hair cut.
Because it was too long. And she thought it looked bad.

oh no she didn't

Well. I put the kibosh on that quicker than you can say Here's a Band Aid.

I try to be nice to her when our paths cross, but she's just a crabby old bitch.

Today was my first solo dia in 10 weeks.
I took a yoga class, opened my hips, and chatted with my friend Yogini Shannon.
I was tempted to have a margarita for lunch, but prudently decided against tequila and had a chocolate milkshake instead.

I thought about grocery shopping, and vacuuming, and putting the laundry away, but shit.
I just got back from vacation. I have to go back to work tomorrow. I need a day of rest.
And ice cream.

So when Crabby School Nurse called at 3:24 and said Ty threw up you have to come get him NOW, I didn't argue.
But I also didn't drop what I was doing and race over there.

I'm a bitch and a bad mommy.

Well, he seems OK about it.
I think he's established himself well enough over the past four years that he will not forever be known as
The Kid Who Threw Up On The First Day Of School.

I wish every school day went as smoothly as today. Except for the vomit part. We can skip that part going forward.


raise your frosty margarita glasses high to the 2010/2011 school year



  1. Oooh that nurse crossed a line. Big time. She's probably threatened by other medical professionals because she's a school nurse.
    Can't believe you're just starting back. We're in week 3 in IL, but you probably learn more than we do because our cirriculum changes yearly and the kids get to watch a lot, I mean a lot of movies in class. Helps keep their attention I guess.
    My son threw up on his shoes at dismissal in first grade. It was a clusterfuck because I was picking up my daughter from preschool, my car wouldn't start, I was stranded and this was before cell phones. A neighbor I can barely stand picked him up for me, because I was mia. And freaking out that he didn't get off the bus.
    It was one of the most awful days in my parenting career. Luckily, we've all survived and thrived and nobody remembers him as pukey shoes.
    Welcome back from your amazing, colorful vacation. Your pictures made me smile a huge smile.

  2. I think I wish I'd had a mom like you. My mom taught school so the first day never brought her any happiness, believe me.
    Enjoy your moments to yourself, Michelle. They are precious.

  3. clink back at ya! even though it is now 9:04 on a Wednesday morning... I clink my coffee mug to the new school year.

    Poor puking kid... that totally blows... chunks.

  4. Ms. Moon's comment reminded me that my mom had nightmares the few days before school started. Poor thing.

  5. We need to have some margaritas together, because I have my share of school nurse/secretary stories to share. I mean, I could tell you them now, but frankly, I could use a drink, and they will be much funnier if we are both drunk.

  6. Poor Ty. And the school nurse is a bitch. Hair cut, my ass.

    Love you,


  7. Glad the day went pretty good for all involved. We had our first day (kindergarten and preschool) back in July, and it was a rough one for me. We are now scheduled for parent teacher conferences because we are almost done with first quarter.

  8. Aaah, poor puky kid on the first day.

    clinking coffee mug here...

  9. Serious boundary issues. I would have issues as well with that nurse.


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