Haven't fragged in a while. It's good to be back. Thanks Mrs 4444s
It's suddenly hot here and the sun is making me drunk. I'm in it for a minute, and I start to nod. And my words come out all scrambled. And I can't think straight.
I love it.
But I haven't gotten anything done.
I sit in the sun, and pretend to work on my re-certification exam. I read a few articles, answer a few questions, and fall asleep. In the sun.
Not so bad. Not so bad atall
When Bruce and I were first dating, we would spend our entire weekend lying in the sun in Prospect Park. Armed with coffee and sweet stuff from Connecticut Muffin on 7th Ave, we would spread a blanket and lie lay lye lei in the sun for hours. We would talk and snooze and talk and snuggle and talk some more. We talked politics. We talked about our pasts. We talked about our dreams. But mostly, we talked about our future. We would get sloppy sun drunk and stumble home and Bruce would cook a yummy dinner and we'd drink red wine and fall asleep watching a movie.
Last weekend, by some miracle, we were kidless for a few hours. And the sun was hot and bright. And we hung our in it and got sun drunk. Sloppy sun drunk. And talked about the future.
M: I get so bloated with my period now. That never used to happen. What the fuck? I'm ready for menopause.
B: Maybe it's a sign. Do you think menopause is starting for you?
M: Who the fuck knows? No one will talk about it and I'm sure as hell not buying one of those stupid fucking books. Jesus, I have a degree and in school they didn't even talk about what happens as we get older. No one told me my eyesight would go to hell after 40. No one told me my periods would get shorter and lighter after 40. How the fuck do I know about menopause. No one really talks about it.
B: What about Grumsie my mom didn't she ever talk about it?
M: Seriously Bruce? Come on now... all I know from her is about draginal vyness.
B: Draginal vyness? Is that what you said? Am I supposed to know what that is?
he's thinking it's some fancy medical term
M: Yeah. That's what I said. But I meant vaginal dryness. You know about that...
B: I sure do Chica
Right. So I'm well past 40 and I can't see for shit. I squint down the hall at people I've worked with for 13 years cause I can't quite make out who they are.
So I decided it's time for glasses. My opthalmologist has been telling me for 2 years that my eyes are fine and I'm just getting old. But I can't see. He shrugs his shoulders. It'll get worse.
Seriously? That's all you have for me? I send you half a dozen new patients a day and all you can do is tell me I'm old and my eyes are gonna get worse?
Next stop Walmart. Cheap glasses for cheap people. I picked out a cute pair of frames that all 3 kids gave the thumbs up. Astounding. Jack said I look like a sexy librarian.
Randy Jackson Mens Frames. DAWG
The cute helpful and very professional tech fitted me and said they look good on you. Not many people could pull it off.
Monday I went back to work I fell asleep on my lunch break. WTF? By mid afternoon, my throat was sore. Double WTF? I had been home with the kids for 10 days. No cooties from work. The kids were fine. How the hell could I have gotten sick? By Wednesday my tonsils looked like bloody marshmallows. Owwwie. Then I realized cute specs weren't the only thing I picked up at Walmart. I put my face in the otoscope eye exam thing that half of Dutchess County have put their faces on. YUCK. And you know they don't disinfect between exams at Walmart. The last thing I am is a germaphobe. I sit on public toilet seats and rarely wash my hands when I leave public restrooms. I frequently claim the immune system of a cockroach. You've never seen cockroaches in a Walmart, have you? My throat was so bad I actually started antibiotics. I haven't taken antibiotics in YEARS. I feel better now.
So between being sun drunk and being Walmart infected, I haven't been commenting as much as I'd like this week. I'm sorry, bloggy friends. But I have been visiting you all and reading. And the new specs make it extra enjoyable.
Have a great Friday!