Its really hard to close credit card accounts.
It's not hard as in ohmygod I can't do this I need more credit cards way.
It's hard because the goddam fucking automated phone voice gives "close my account" as the very. last. option.
After 7 minutes of please enter this and please enter that
I am forced to suffer a gazillion questions from a real live person about why I want to close my account.
Are you aware of all the benefits this account has to offer?
Do you realize that once the account is closed, it cannot be reopened?
Why would I sit on the phone for 12 minutes to close an account and then want to reopen it?
I'd just like to close the account, please.
just a buzz in my ear as I repeatedly repeat
I'd just like to close my account please.
This is my own damn fault. I open accounts usually around christmas time to get 15% off or interest free financing or some such nonsense.
I pay off the balance right away and forget the card exists.
I decided today it was time to loose the cards. They're just taking up space in my wallet.
It took me 45 minutes, 3 continents and 4 time zones to cancel everything. Sheesh
I'm on my eighth load of laundry.
Cause the damn dog has fleas.
I thought they were just mosquito bites.
The kids said Dusty has fleas
I said He does not
The kids said Amy the most awesome babysitter said she saw one
Though I trust Amy completely, I still said Dusty does not have fleas.
I checked him over the weekend. Twice. No fleas.
Eventhough I have a Don't Call Me At Work Unless There's Blood Or Fire Rule, Monday evening my phone rings.
The same rule stands when I'm blogging or on the phone.
This rule is frequently broken.
Ty says ummm... mom.... Dusty has fleas
Ty? Ty? Seriously, Ty? What am I supposed to do about that right this very minute?
Ummm... we just wanted to tell you.
Ty! I'm seeing patients. Dusty does not have fleas. And even if he did, there's nothing I can do about it right now. Is there?
Ummm... no mom.
So I get home at 10 Monday night, totally cross eyed. The kids are still up.
Jack walks by and says Dusty has fleas.
Goddammit you guys! Dusty does not have fleas.
I flop down and huff and get all dramatic and start examining the damn dog, who rolls over and wags his tail.
Look you guys... no fle...
I see one lone black bugger crawling through the damn dog's fur
I start to itch
dammit dammit dammit
off to Google
...for every adult flea there are at least 10 eggs and 2 larvae...
Dusty had a date with the groomer today.
And I stripped all the beds all the slipcovers all the blankets and all the sleeping bags
and started washing.
The groomer did a great job.
She said yup I saw fleas. He's not infested, but he definitely has them.
Ty has fleas, too. Poor thing.
Do you know what happens when 112 year old pipes get overburdened with 8 loads of washer drainage and dog hair?
Another call to Mr. LongSnakeMan.
At this point, we agree. Snaking is for pussies.
He will return tomorrow and replace a good part of our old cast iron sewage pipes with PVC.
During Jack's birthday party.
Jack said look at it this way, mom. you got a lot accomplished today.
He said this before I got the car cleaned like, really cleaned and my tattoo finished.
And he didn't even know about this morning's quickie vag post.
He's so the glass is almost full kinda kid.
Tomorrow is his 13th birthday