"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn
it's a jungle out there
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Morning poo and questionable mommy judgement
Warning: total TMI post but you know that's how I roll and I expect some of you have been sitting in the same spot. on the same pot.
I gotta poop Mom wait I gotta poop Mom I need to take a shower Ty showers every day now since he developed ringworm on his neck and I told him it's from not showering frequently enough
which by the way is only minimally true
Strike 1: Manipulative Parental Dishonesty at least it's not the hair on his palms thing I gotta poop Ty gimme five minutes Ok Nevermind I'll go upstairs Ty sighs in relief good Up the steps I got to poop brushy brushy brushy Jack's brushing his teeth in the upstairs bathroom Oh my god I gotta poop I hear Jack finish brushing thank god but then I hear the medicine cabinet open and close
dental floss dammit now is not the time for good oral hygiene I gotta poop I'm pacing like the Dusty Dog when I've forgotten to let him out Mom I need help with my homework Right. Mia's homework.
The homework she didn't do yesterday when we were snowed in because instead I allowed her to have a Secret Life of an American Teenager netflix marathon.
Strike 2: Questionable Parental Judgement Honey I gotta poop Can't I come in with you? Honey I want privacy But I wanna come in with you Ok fine but you can't talk to me you have to be quiet But what if I have a question about my homework? Ok fine A few questions later and Mia is done with her homework and is replaced by Ty who has finished his shower in the downstairs bathroom.
And is now standing in the upstairs bathroom.
Where I'm pooping. Finally I love you mommy I love you too honey He comes over and wedges himself between me on the toilet and the bathtub and gives me a hug Honey I'm pooping I know mom but I love you so much He's in love with me today because last night I caved and got him a cell phone.
He used the mom you can save the planet arguement which gets me every timeeven though his reasoning was completely faulty.
And he knew it.
Ball or strike? Ball Ok honey I love you too Then he just stands there,wedged between me and the toilet and the tub, looking at me and smiling. Honey I need to wipe do you wanna stay or do you wanna give me some privacy? ummm...privacy mom Good choice
"it occurred to me that the only real sin you can commit as a mother is to deny your children's right to be who they are and what they want to be and that the only real sin you can commit against yourself is to deny who you truly are and prevent yourself from being who that is"