"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn
it's a jungle out there
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
I had the funniest conversation with the Postal Lady this morning. I was on a really long day-before-thanksgiving line to certified-mail-return-receipt a letter to the IRS. The fuckingIRS which doesn't, by the way, have a forgiving bone in its institutional body. Harumpf
Due to an honestly honest oversight on the part of both our accountant AND ourselves we inadvertently didn't pay taxes on our full income. It was the staple's fault. The staple that held together TWO W-2s printed on tissue paper resulting in only HALF Bruce's income being declared. Oh well. Honest mistake. So we paid the taxes owed immediately but petitioned to have the SUBSTANTIAL interest charges waived because it was an HONEST mistake dammit. Let me tell you, the IRS doesn't give a rat's ass about honesty or mistakes.
But you probably already know that
So it's my turn and I say certified return receipt please. And Postal Lady says would you like to express mail that with guaranteed overnight delivery and insurance up to 100$? And I smile and say no thanks it's not necessary. And she says and to further annoy you the lady next to me chuckles would you like priority mail guaranteed 3-4 day delivery? I laugh and say no thanks. She smiles and says you know they make us say this stuff and I laugh and say it's like would you like to supersize that? And Postal Lady says RIGHT it always has to be bigger or faster in this country. Its never enough. You make a lot of money here and you need to make more. Some countries they're lucky to have clean water. did she just say clean water? And here it's never enough. And I say and we're probably more miserable too and the lady next to me laughs again. And Postal Lady says bah miserable??? Come here for a day I'll show you miserable. It's ridiculous with all this stuff we're the most miserable people on the planet. And the Other Postal Lady who has a heavy eastern european accent and probable spent a good part of her life in a war torn country laughs and murmurs yes there is misery here. And the 4 of us, tired working women in america-the-land-of-plenty have a good hearted and jolly chuckle and I wish them a Happy Thanksgiving
Then I made my way to Hannaford's. I have no idea what possessed me to wait till today to buy brussel sprouts for tomorrow.
I emailed my sister Halona while waiting on line:
Breaking my own food rules. Last week got crushed pineapple delivered instead of chunks. The only thing I know how to do with crushed pineapple is make ambrosia. Remember mrs busing's ambrosia? Coconut mini marshmallows frozen cool whip. Couldn't bring myself to buy cool whip so I bought heavy cream instead and made the mistake of reading the ingredients. Ingredients ???? Exactly. Why not just heavy cream in heavy cream? Please. Cursed at the dairy case. I'm sure I looked crazy Continued sliding down the slippery slope to the frozen chicken bits of unknown origin case and got one bag of bits in buffalo sauce and another bag of bits in honey barbecue sauce. And tater tots. Cause we can't eat chicken bits and ambrosia without reconstituted potato bits in those perfect mouth fitting tater tot shapes
They'll eat good food tomorrow
"They" being my kids. Of course. I then had a very enjoyable conversation with the developmentally delayed adult bagging my groceries. All the baggers are developmentally delayed adults. One of the things I love about Hannaford's. I also love that it's not a mega super sized grocery store. I'm not a super size kinda girl. The bagger gave me sage advice. He said I shouldn't get too stressed about the holidays. That I should go slow and enjoy myself. And relax. There you go.
All morning I encountered smiling, laughing, lovely people. The day before Thanksgiving.
WHAT THE FUCK???
So not expecting that. No shoving, no grabbing, no grumbling, no cutting off to get the last parking space. Lots of please and thank-you. Lots of looking straight in the eyes and smiling.
And I say again... WHAT THE FUCK?
it came without ribbons
it came without tags
it came without packages boxes or bags
Sorry I'm fast forwarding, but you get my point. If radio stations and chain stores can do it, so can I dammit.
"it occurred to me that the only real sin you can commit as a mother is to deny your children's right to be who they are and what they want to be and that the only real sin you can commit against yourself is to deny who you truly are and prevent yourself from being who that is"