"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn

"ignore the story. see the soul. remember to love. you will never regret it" --- Seane Corn
it's a jungle out there

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My Funny Valentines

So I'm a little late. What else is new?

As you can see, my blue balls are still hanging low in the snow.

view from my porch this morning

Jack's mortified and begging me to take the Christmas lights down.

No way Jose. I like my blue balls. They're a pick-me-up and put a spring in my step during these long grey winter days.

And I'm genetically incapable of being on time. Seriously. Hence the Valentine's Decor pasted on my blog walls today.
I promise it won't stay up till Fourth of July...


Jack: mom there's this thing... a ghillie suit... And I'd really like to make one
Me: a what?
Jack: a ghillie suit. Its like full body camouflage that snipers wear. I want to make one and I might need some help
Me: sigh I dunno Jack... I'm already totally ambivalent about modern warfare call of duty tho deb at dirty socks and pizza says it's scientifically proven to be ok
Jack with his best puppy dog face: I just thought it would be a really good family project that we could all do together. You know... quality time
Me: quality time?... making a sniper suit? Good lord!

Jack's so independent. So reliable. Such a good kid. He's listed as currently in a relationship on his Facebook page if you catch my drift


Ty fiddles with things. If he's sitting reading, eating, or watching tv, his hands are always touching something close by. The other day he came into the bathroom as I was clipping my toenails. As we chat, he absentmindedly starts playing with the long ass haven't been shaved in 3 months hair on my shin. All of a sudden he realizes what he's doing
Ty: mom?...what is this?
Me: it's leg hair, honey
Ty: but... totally bewildered why is it so long?
Me: cause I haven't bothered to shave in a while
Ty in horrified fascination: Mom... that's crazy... Jack c'mere... look at this!
I've got my own ghillie suit right here thank you very much

Ty's on another planet. Always has been. But he's playing The Nutcracker Suites and Bach's Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring and the Prelude to the Cello Suites. After only 16 months on the cello. His teacher just hands him the music and he plays it. And I see him flying with this and I can't keep up and it's crazy to watch and it makes my heart hurt cause if he continues like this he will probably outgrow what this county has to offer before he's in high school. And then what?


In the never ending attempt to find common ground with Mia, I handed her a Sundance Catalogue
Me: Mia, honey, look at the pretty clothes in this
She looks at me skeptically, and give me her best one eyebrow raised look. She starts flipping through the pages exuding both boredom and impatience. She tosses the catalogue aside with just a wee bit of disdain
Me: you don't like any of it? I pick up the catalogue and start flipping through. What about this top? Eyes roll at me. How 'bout these shoes? Aren't they pretty? exasperated sigh and arms cross her chest. Oh come on honey, what about this? You don't like this ruffly blouse?
Mia: Mommy, you just need to face the fact we so don't have the same taste

She had a Valentine's Date. They sat alone at the sushi bar. He gave her roses and chocolate. She gave him a stuffed animal and candy hearts. The sushi man made them heart shaped sushi. They were adorable.

What am I gonna do when she's 14?


So. The Christmas decorations still on the porch. The Valentines Day decor after the fact. Hating that Halloween stuff is on sale when school starts and Thanksgiving stuff is on sale at Halloween and Christmas stuff goes on sale in July. I'm in no rush. I'm dragging my feet. Cause every day I see my kids growing up and up and up. And I don't want the time to go too fast. As exciting as it is to see them change, as much as it cracks me up and leaves me shaking my head in disbelief, it's all a little too fast.

You know what I mean.

So. I'm late. I don't rush the holidays. I don't jump the gun. This is the I'm fooling myself way that I can slow down time and keep them with me forever. That I can keep them from growing up up and away too fast.

It's not going to work, is it?


  1. I LOVE the blue balls. Leave them up. There's nothing like peeking into someone's window, way past Christmas and seeing Christmas decorations. I love those kinds of people. A perfect balance to the more anal types like myself.

    The rest of the post made me laugh aloud. I will send my Oliver, current resident camo/all things military fanatic over for your family sniper day.

  2. My baby is turning four on Sunday, and I want to rewind the clock. Too fast, too fast.

    I saw a man wear a ghille suit to the local grocery store. That's the kind of town I live in. Made the baby cry.

  3. i'm in no rush, yet i am. i wonder if i would just accept the holidays, and not hate them so, maybe i wouldn't be in a hurry for them to be over and i would feel more relaxed and time would slow.

    your kids sound amazing. and smart and sassy and complex. i love it.

    oh, we actually have the beginnings of a ghillie suit at our house. personally, i think it makes them look like sasquatch, but maybe that's the look they're going for, because, you know, NOBODY would notice if bigfoot were to run by. camouflage, indeed.

  4. First, about the blue balls - they are so pretty, I would never take them down either.

    I did manage to take down my tree and reclaim my counters from christmas decor, but the wreaths are still hanging over the garage doors, and I laugh at them every day. Mr. Mel has to take them down, and he's in no particular hurry!

    Your kids are amazing, they are all so different, aren't they? The ghillie suit would be great for next Halloween, your son can be in charge of scaring the trick or treaters! I found the youtube video mesmerizing, and now I'll wonder where snipers could hide on my walks with the dog.

    Another wonderful post, and I'm still thinking about Valentines heart photos and crafts too, so you are not alone!

  5. I hear you about the growing up too fast. My daughter will start kindergarten this July. KINDERGARTEN!!! Where on earth has the time gone????

    Also, about the shaving legs thing....I stopped shaving my legs back in 'No Shave November'...except I started the second week of October. And didn't shave in December, January....and over the weekend I shaved my left leg....still have really long hair on my right leg...I'll get to it soon enough, right?

  6. I like this Valentine's Day background. I say you keep it up for awhile.

  7. I love your attitude. I love your blue balls and now your hearts. If you keep them up until the 4th of July, it will be okay. I can't even imagine what it feels like to have kids growing growing growing. Love the little peeks into their personalities and lives. Love your writing. And your hairy legs (I NEVER shave mine! oh the horrors).

  8. Oh my stars....I fear for you when they're grown. I had such a hard time when A left home. It was almost the end of me....it was partially the end of me.

    I so love your family & your spirit & what you give to your babies.

    Don't let Mia date yet! LOL

  9. Michelle, I agree with the rest of your audience: the blue balls are too wonderful to give into your kids: keep them; they will laugh when they're older.
    And one other note about cello - let the fingers fly and let him outgrow whatever can be taught wherever you are. When I was a young woman of 20, with a hint of a voice, I found a teacher by stepping almost accidentally into a local church choir. She turned out to be the teacher I needed; the inspiration to take me far beyond where I dreamed I would go. So it will be with your cello player. The teacher will come. The instrument will be played. As long as you keep music at the center, you're good.
    Angie at Eat Here

  10. I'd be pretty happy to stop time right now too.

    I think my leg hair's right up there with yours. I've got zero reasons to do anything about it... no man, not shorts weather... so it grows and grows.

  11. No, it's not going to work, but I love you for trying to keep the kids small. I also love the blue balls. I hate shaving my legs though. HATE IT. I do one leg one day, the other, another day. I hate it THAT BAD.

    I love you though.


  12. I read this and I think of Owen, asleep a few feet away and how every day he has changed, he has grown and the tears spring to my eyes.
    No. We can't stop it. There is no stopping it. Our babies grow up to become adults and we watch from the wings, our hearts beating so hard they threaten to jump out of our chests. We hold our hands out to warn them of the dangers, to try and protect them from the heartbreaks, to try and encourage them to run, to fly, to sing, to play, to learn.
    We push them and hold them at the same time.
    I love you Michelle. Just keep remembering what a great and wonderful grandmother you are going to be. Be comforted by the fact that you will get to watch all of this again and it will be the best thing you've ever done besides this- what you are doing now- so well.

  13. No worries about your blue balls:) I keep my lights up and call them "winter lights".
    Before I owned the studio my favorite thing to do was to let my leg hair grow all winter so I could go out on the first warm spring day in a skirt and feel the wind in (yikes) my leg hair. Then I would shave and winter would officially be over to me.
    Sigh- my poor, delusional, clueless, son...Maybe he'll figure it out when Mia is married and having her first baby- with someone other than him. Hey- at least I know he won't be a player- a stalker perhaps...a player? nope. ha ha.
    Hope to see you tomorrow at yoga.
    exes and ohs, lady!


so... wadaya think?

Your fairy is called Columbine Icedancer
She is a bone chilling bringer of justice for the vulnerable.
She lives in mushroom fields and quiet meadows.
She is only seen when the bees swarm and the crickets chirrup.
She wears lilac and purple like columbine flowers. She has icy blue butterfly wings.